My name is B.J. and I’m an artaholic.
Alright, I shouldn’t make fun of that, but I couldn’t resist.
I got into 3D art initially to try to do book covers, that was it. Since then, I’ve become addicted. I’ve spent all my free money two months in a row on content for Daz Studio, and I have every intention of doing it the next few months as well. There’s also Vue, I want to start buying the software and the content to go with it as well. More than that, this 3D art has awakened in me something long sleeping.
In high school, there was no class (except one term I took creative writing) that I loved more than art class. I continued to take it right through to grade 12. I had, actually, initially wanted to apply to an animation program for college. However, while I did have some talent, my disability limited me and I hit such a depression in grade 12 that my art suffered as well, and my grade 12 art teacher convinced me I wouldn’t be able to keep up. So, I gave up, applying to a TV/film/radio production program instead. (Honestly, I probably would have done ok in a non-animation art program, but at the time my dream was crushed so I went for the next best thing. I have never once gotten a job from those years of school.)
Except to paint Warhammer 40k and Battletech miniatures, I haven’t picked up a paint brush since then. Most of those old skills are long since lost over the last 15 years. However, now, I want to bring them back. I find myself looking at Wacom tablets (something I’ve never used, but the potential alone interests me), art supplies and software. I’ve even looked into correspondence art courses I could take, but there’s no way I could afford to. I want to do so much, but I find myself limited by lack of funds. I feel very much like the addict who wants a bigger fix and can’t afford it.
So, for now, I do what I can. Whenever my shoulder is up to heavy mouse work, I create a picture in Daz, and one in Vue. My father’s into painting as well, so I may borrow some of his art supplies one of these days, and try painting for real again. It’ll probably suck, but I want to try. In the meantime I’ll look for affordable ways to relearn what I’ve lost, and learn more going forward.
Now, this isn’t to say that I’m giving up on writing. I still love writing. It is still my chosen career. I’ve just discovered another outlet for my creativity. Or, rather, rediscovered. I just wish I could afford to dive into it the way I’d like to.